You are Not Your Audience

12/14/21 • 04m

The ways in which we kneecap ourselves creatively can be varied and subtle. "I only write in the mornings." "Everything I make has to be original." "I only read authors who share my political beliefs" (I'm slowly getting over this one). In order to discipline ourselves, we often impose top-down limits on how our creative process should take shape.

One example I frequently see popping up is the dictum: "Create what you consume." Variations of this may read as "You should only write what you read," "You should only make art that you'd like to see" and "You should only write music you'd like to listen to."

There are only two reasons I can think of for living by the "create what you consume" code:

You plan on only engaging with your own stuff
You want to master a particular style

Point #2 is legit. If you want to write, you need to read. And, if you want to write good, you need to read good writers. Or, at the very least, wild writers. The same goes for making art, writing music, designing posters, or making a respectable marinara.

But, unless you're obsessed with yourself as much as I am with my own self, or for some reason are at a loss for things to read or listen to, you really don't need to write books, music, plays or otherwise create content that you would enjoy to consume. You just need to enjoy the process of creating it.

Story Time Break

I played in a band for fifteen years. I loved writing music for that band, and people who knew it seemed to dig it. But, it was rarely the kind of music I listened to. During those years all I listened to was dancehall, dub, and reggae. I would have loved to be a dancehall producer, deeply involved in the creation of the music I listened to most. But, you know what? I sucked at writing dancehall riddims. Just...terrible.

But, you know what I didn't suck at? Writing fast, angular, note-y, noise-pop tunes with heavy drums and bass. The exact kind of music my band, SPRCSS, was known for. It wasn't what I was listening to day-to-day. I don't even think I own copies of my albums. But, who cares? Someone liked it, and I was happy to oblige.

Writing from this place changed my relationship to what it meant to create art. It became less about getting across my inner most thoughts and more about making things for people. Styles of music became types of gifts. When I wrote music it was for others, and was largely dependent on what they wanted to hear. Folk music? Sure, I can do that. Holiday tunes? Easy. Doom sludge? Yes, please. I'm was in it for the camaraderie, not the iconoclasm.

You Are Not Your Audience

There are two reasons I've come across as to why people feel the need to create what they consume, and both have to do with self worth.

In the first scenario, a person admires a designer's work and wants to create designs that look and feel like that work. The ability to emulate the artist becomes the bar against which this person judges the value of their own work. They may be amazing at creating other, different kinds of work that itself is worthy of respect and may lead to accolades from the community, but because the bar is tethered to a specific style, it is often missed, and leads to self-doubt and despondency.

The other scenario yields the same result, but comes from the opposite direction. A writer doesn't like a certain style or genre of writing, considering it less-than or of lesser value, and does everything in their power to write in a way contrary to that style. The problem is, they are actually great at writing in this style! However, rather than allowing themselves to write in that vein, which by the nature of every person's inherent uniqueness would yield unique work that could actually end up challenging the conventions of the disliked genre, they instead muscle their way into other styles that they endlessly struggle with because they are incongruent with their talents. And, just as in scenario 1, having tethered their self-worth to actualizing this goal, end up feeling as if they lack talent.

The fact is, just because you don't read newsletters doesn't mean you shouldn't write them. Just because you hate figurative art doesn't mean you shouldn't paint flowers. Just because you wouldn't want to buy a certain style of table, doesn't mean you shouldn't be making those kinds of tables. Create what you're good at creating.

A Question to Consider

Is your chosen vehicle of expression the one that best suits your expression? Or, are you holding onto a method or practice that isn't really yours? 🌴

Bob is the author of Sitting with Spirits: Exploring the Unseen World In the Margins of Christianity; The House of I Am Mirrors: And Other Poems; Acupressure For Beginners; and The Power of Stretching. You can stay up to date on his doings and goings by signing up for his weekly email “The High Pony: Really Good Insights for Living an Inspired Life.” bobdoto.computer for everything else.